Not a homebody..yet

 I’m not a homebody,

I’m not a nap person,

I’m not a “chill” person,

I’m not a “we’ll wait and see what happens” kinda girl.. 

nope. 

None of that.

Never have been.

I literally plan like every second of my life and I’m always on the go.. it’s nothing for me to be gone all weekend and get very little sleep then work all week and be a literal zombie!

but I’m learning that it’s never too late to change/grow and filling my life up with stuff doesn’t create happiness or necessarily make my life better- it just makes it busy!

 **Always feeling the need to be busy is a trauma response.** 

There’s something to be said for being content at home.. I’ve never understood how people could spend the weekend at home or not have plans when they aren’t at work. I’ve never understood how people could live without socializing BUT I’m starting too..

I’ve got 3 kids, by myself! To get everyone ready and out the door then watch them all by myself is a lot! I know they have fun and I do too but it is stressful and exhausting! 

I work all week and then when we are gone all weekend too it feels like there’s no point in having an apartment because I’m never even here!! 

My battery has been dead

My feet have been tired

I’m driving the wheels off my car

I’ve been trying to chill more.. which is really hard for me. I feel like I’m forgetting something or failing..

I just keep telling myself, this doesn’t mean we can’t still have fun or spend quality time together! It doesn’t mean we will never go out- it just means we will find happiness in little things like a board game or a movie night! It means we will rest more!

If something is weighing you down it only makes sense to let it go!

This is new for us but we are going to try and be more laid back, more rested and more carefree! 

I put too much pressure on myself! We don’t have to drive somewhere cool to have a good day together ❤️❤️❤️