Step up, church!!!

I am pro life- in every circumstance- I always have been and always will be.
But, I can understand why some people struggle to choose life. Being a mom is hard, tiring, expensive, lonely, comes with a lot of stress, worry and guilt.. it’s not for everyone. (I’m not condoning abortion.. don’t stop reading- I have a point here)

When I announced I was pregnant with my first two children the reactions I received were far from what I had hoped. I was married and working so you would think it would be “approved” but many Christians/family members and even friends made comments to me. “How will you afford this?” “Have you thought this through?” “I don’t understand why you would want to be a mom at 20 years old” “I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into” so on.. so forth.

It was very discouraging (to say the least) I was excited, making plans, picking out names and cute baby clothes.. I just wanted someone to share my joy! I look back now and I think to myself THANK GOODNESS I had a relationship with Christ. THANK GOODNESS I knew that my baby was not a mistake and God already had a plan in mind for me and my baby. THANK GOODNESS Phoenix was given to me and not someone who didn’t have Jesus in heir heart.

For almost 5 months of my pregnancy I was completely alone. Dylan and I were separated and I lived by myself. It was a dark time in my life and if I hadn’t of been able to feel her moving inside me- knowing she was depending on me I’m not sure how I would have made it through. I needed love, support, someone checking in, someone to talk too. But that support wasn’t there.

Aiden was unexpected to say the least.. Phoenix was only 17 months old when he was born. We were working opposite shifts, had a tiny apartment and not a lot of extra money. Again, we received rude comments.. the last thing we needed.

I say all of this- not for sympathy.. to help people understand the stress that comes with being a mom, the judgement people pass, the lack of support. Words DO hurt!

We were in church, working, married, paying for everything ourselves, raising our own children and STILL we felt judged. I literally heard a woman at church telling someone else that there are “rules” to having children. She said you needed to be married for two years before starting a family and your children should all be 2-3 years apart.. oh, and no more ham 3.
I cannot imagine being a single, young, poor, alone..etc mother. I have seen the stares they get, heard the stereotypes, watched them struggle to provide because they only have one income..  and my heart aches for them.

IF you claim to be pro life.. I have a challenge for you..
donate to pregnancy crisis centers, genuinely ask a mom if she needs help, NEVER say anything more than CONGRSFULATIONS when someone announces their pregnancy, vote for politicians who are pro life.. etc.
IT IS NOT ENOUGH to say “I’m pro life. Don’t have an abortion” we need to step up! Make someone else’s burden your own! There are too many children in foster care or broken homes. There are too many mothers struggling. There are too many people afraid to come to church because of the “judge” people there.
Help a mom at Walmart, take a momma who needs a break out to lunch, get a single mom something for mother’s day, give an expecting woman some diapers/wipes/clothes, don’t make rude comments about someone feeding their child formula.

LOVE! That is all we are called to do! Let God worry about the rest! Be a safe place for someone to land.
You have  NO IDEA what’s going on in someone’s life- and you don’t need to know to be a light.

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