Movin' on
I know this is random- and sounds even a little concieted. But I was talking about it with someone today- so to me, it seems completely relevant.
I've been through my fare-share of hard times, over the past couple years. While I don't claim to be completely out-of-the-woods, or perfect in any way- I will say that I'm rather proud of the progress I've made so far. .
I can tell you without any hesitation, mistakes I've made- things I reget- things I'd be embarrassed over, or try to deny- all things about myself and my past.
But I can't do any of those things. It took me awhile to realize that- but I finally have. And I've made some steps in the right direction, of moving on and becoming my own person. I'm still a bit of a push-over and sentimental, soft-hearted.. etc. Like I said, I need to do better. But I'm still much more independent and self-reliant than I once was. I have been, to some extent all of my life, being the oldest of 5 children- but now I'm learning to be more than just the oldest, and take care of everyone else- I'm learning to take care of myself as well. I spent far too long relying on others re-inforcement to make me feel better about all I had been through, or what I was feeling. I went to counseling to not get much back. Because I did a lot of talking- and not much acting. I'm so done with that. .
That's one of the several things I look back on, and ask myself ... "why, just why?" while many may think, given the things that I have been through- I've made some significant progress, in a timely manner- I still realize I could have experienced more joy, if I had only traded in all the bitterness I harbored. Along with feelings of regret, "what-ifs", sad memories, long sleepless nights...etc.
That ^ is exactly the point of this post. Not just to reflect on who I once was.. or all the things I want to change. Rather, things I don't know that I would change, if I had the power to, and the lessons I've learned from it.
Lately, scrolling down my news feed- I've been seeing a lot of "downer" posts. And it breaks my heart. I know I've had my fare-share of those. Another thing I look back on and ask myself "why" but being able to relate to them, doesn't make them any easier to read. I am not trying to down-play anyone's problems- or reprimand you. Your Facebook, your right.. if I don't like it, I can scroll on. Still, I want to give a shout-out, to all you downers. I want to give you this one thought and let you do as you wish with it.
Think of all the happiness you're robbing yourself- and taking unhappiness in exchange. Now I'm not the best at math, but that doesn't seem like a winning situation.. -1+1=0 think of the negattive comments/thoughts, as the negative number. You're just equaling zero. That's not a good place to be. I've made it a point to stop with all the negative statuses. At first, it was hard.. and though I dind't put it on Facebook, I probably verbalized it to someone.. then, It got easier.. it's been so long since I've posted something that would be a serious dark-cloud on someone's newsfeed.
That's something I'm proud of. One little action that isn't all that hard, when you think about it, can make a big difference. Made me feel better about myself, and keeps from bringing someone else down when they are spending time on Facebook.
I know, life "sucks" sometimes. But try to find some perspective. Perspective is SO wonderful. I think it's something we should all be abounding in.. it can make a huge difference as well. There are some things that I can understand you'd complain about (death...) others, like "Omg! it's raining.. I'm so bummed right now. My hair is going to be frizzy now. And it's school picture day" in a situation like that, think of it this way:
1. your mom/grandma.. whoever else will be getting (and paying for) your school pictures have more than likely seen you in some pretty not-so-pretty situations.. Flu, Chicken pocks- raccoon eyes after crying.. etc. They won't care. They will still pinch your cheeks and tell you you're precious.
2. when you're 40- you'll look back and wish frizzy hair was your only complaint about your looks..
I know, silly- but it really does pay off to be positive. I promise, it will be one of the best decisions you've ever made.
There's always something positive. I know it's hard to think of things sometimes. But I promise if you truly look for them and you ask for God's help- he will bring something/someone to mind. He doesn't want us to be miserable, anymore than we want to fall off a clift (suicidal thoughts don't count)..
It took me awhile to realize just how blessed I really am. You may be in the same spot. I've always heard that when you're close to the subject, it seems so much worse than it really is. And it's true. As long as I dwell on a problem and worry over it, it will continue to be a problem.
It's not until I take a step back and realize things are smaller from a farther distance, and not as bad as I may have made them out to be... that I can also see what's surrounding that "huge" thing that was devestating me. The good things in life. Small blessings or ways that God works in my life.
I owe a lot of people things.. things I can never repay them for- or say thank-you enough for. And I have a lot to be grateful for/ look forward to.
You do too- if you'll only look for them.. sometimes you'll find that they've been right in front of you, this whole time.
Life is what you make it,
Things are only as bad as you make them seem,
Objects in mirror are closer than they appear... wait, what?
Make a consious effort, until it becomes a habit.. habits are hard to break- so make good ones.
and always breathe.. count to ten. Don't get mad over things that aren't worth your time. Choose your battles wisely.
Know you're loved, valuable, created for a purpose.. beautiful.
I've been through my fare-share of hard times, over the past couple years. While I don't claim to be completely out-of-the-woods, or perfect in any way- I will say that I'm rather proud of the progress I've made so far. .
I can tell you without any hesitation, mistakes I've made- things I reget- things I'd be embarrassed over, or try to deny- all things about myself and my past.
But I can't do any of those things. It took me awhile to realize that- but I finally have. And I've made some steps in the right direction, of moving on and becoming my own person. I'm still a bit of a push-over and sentimental, soft-hearted.. etc. Like I said, I need to do better. But I'm still much more independent and self-reliant than I once was. I have been, to some extent all of my life, being the oldest of 5 children- but now I'm learning to be more than just the oldest, and take care of everyone else- I'm learning to take care of myself as well. I spent far too long relying on others re-inforcement to make me feel better about all I had been through, or what I was feeling. I went to counseling to not get much back. Because I did a lot of talking- and not much acting. I'm so done with that. .
That's one of the several things I look back on, and ask myself ... "why, just why?" while many may think, given the things that I have been through- I've made some significant progress, in a timely manner- I still realize I could have experienced more joy, if I had only traded in all the bitterness I harbored. Along with feelings of regret, "what-ifs", sad memories, long sleepless nights...etc.
That ^ is exactly the point of this post. Not just to reflect on who I once was.. or all the things I want to change. Rather, things I don't know that I would change, if I had the power to, and the lessons I've learned from it.
Lately, scrolling down my news feed- I've been seeing a lot of "downer" posts. And it breaks my heart. I know I've had my fare-share of those. Another thing I look back on and ask myself "why" but being able to relate to them, doesn't make them any easier to read. I am not trying to down-play anyone's problems- or reprimand you. Your Facebook, your right.. if I don't like it, I can scroll on. Still, I want to give a shout-out, to all you downers. I want to give you this one thought and let you do as you wish with it.
Think of all the happiness you're robbing yourself- and taking unhappiness in exchange. Now I'm not the best at math, but that doesn't seem like a winning situation.. -1+1=0 think of the negattive comments/thoughts, as the negative number. You're just equaling zero. That's not a good place to be. I've made it a point to stop with all the negative statuses. At first, it was hard.. and though I dind't put it on Facebook, I probably verbalized it to someone.. then, It got easier.. it's been so long since I've posted something that would be a serious dark-cloud on someone's newsfeed.
That's something I'm proud of. One little action that isn't all that hard, when you think about it, can make a big difference. Made me feel better about myself, and keeps from bringing someone else down when they are spending time on Facebook.
I know, life "sucks" sometimes. But try to find some perspective. Perspective is SO wonderful. I think it's something we should all be abounding in.. it can make a huge difference as well. There are some things that I can understand you'd complain about (death...) others, like "Omg! it's raining.. I'm so bummed right now. My hair is going to be frizzy now. And it's school picture day" in a situation like that, think of it this way:
1. your mom/grandma.. whoever else will be getting (and paying for) your school pictures have more than likely seen you in some pretty not-so-pretty situations.. Flu, Chicken pocks- raccoon eyes after crying.. etc. They won't care. They will still pinch your cheeks and tell you you're precious.
2. when you're 40- you'll look back and wish frizzy hair was your only complaint about your looks..
I know, silly- but it really does pay off to be positive. I promise, it will be one of the best decisions you've ever made.
I'm not perfect- I can be negative, too. But I have learned to get a little better, and get up off the ground and start over. If you have a faulty foundation- you'll just fall over again. Don't crumble- or take the bait, all for the momentary "satisfaction" of complaining.
"Whatever is true, noble, lovely, above reproach- think on these things"There's always something positive. I know it's hard to think of things sometimes. But I promise if you truly look for them and you ask for God's help- he will bring something/someone to mind. He doesn't want us to be miserable, anymore than we want to fall off a clift (suicidal thoughts don't count)..
It took me awhile to realize just how blessed I really am. You may be in the same spot. I've always heard that when you're close to the subject, it seems so much worse than it really is. And it's true. As long as I dwell on a problem and worry over it, it will continue to be a problem.
It's not until I take a step back and realize things are smaller from a farther distance, and not as bad as I may have made them out to be... that I can also see what's surrounding that "huge" thing that was devestating me. The good things in life. Small blessings or ways that God works in my life.
I owe a lot of people things.. things I can never repay them for- or say thank-you enough for. And I have a lot to be grateful for/ look forward to.
You do too- if you'll only look for them.. sometimes you'll find that they've been right in front of you, this whole time.
Life is what you make it,
Things are only as bad as you make them seem,
Objects in mirror are closer than they appear... wait, what?
Make a consious effort, until it becomes a habit.. habits are hard to break- so make good ones.
and always breathe.. count to ten. Don't get mad over things that aren't worth your time. Choose your battles wisely.
Know you're loved, valuable, created for a purpose.. beautiful.
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